Monday, September 15, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.
I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here. He is frustrated about something. He just went into a silent tirade. I can’t quite make out what’s bothering him, but it is either the recent half-measures proposed by the POTUS about ISIL in Iraq, or he is reenacting a particularly animated breakup with an office romance that happened in 1983.

He seems to be lecturing his window mirror image about how the Unites States has behaved poorly over the last decade or more, making either too rash or too timid decisions about foreign policy and US interests throughout the world.

Or, he seems to be arguing with Uniqua about a reckless dalliance with a bisexual cabaret dancer in 1983, at a time where everyone in the office pool is noticing that they are acting more and more like a married couple every day, but that Uniqua’s family, former Civil Rights activists and Black Power advocates, would not be pleased to have her bring him, a young baseball player looking pasty faced, back to Greensville, Alabama for Thanksgiving.

He stares out into the green-gray haze of the afternoon sky, through the triple glazed safety windows, reminiscing about the halcyon days of the Reagan Administration.

Three Desi IT fellows decided that they felt most comfortable. They are comparing breakfast bunch places in the Western Suburbs. One fellow is the “foodie”; the other two are misers. One goes to the nicer places for the experience. The other two are trying to get the most for their money. My wife would love this conversation. I stay quiet, with headphones in my head.

Also here are Jeffrey Dahmer, Clive Owen, Katey Segal, Will Farrell, and Harvey Keitel. The are armed.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City.

Dr.Jeckyl-Hyde is in full swing. He has his right hand supporting the right side of his animated face, which is speaking to the back of Benched War Correspondent’s head.

Evidently he was listening to Elizabeth Warren’s questions to the SEC general, where she asked the question “Why hasn’t the SEC recommended a list of bank executives to be further prosecuted for fraud for the collapse of the economy due to CDS (Or CDO or CDL) – bad mortgages, since the Banks have already claimed direct liability and have been accrued fines of up to $32B?”

The SEC General, whose name J-H is now pondering, didn’t have a direct answer, stating that the SEC is a monitoring agency only with no prosecutorial powers. J-H renacts Sen. Warren’s clarification to the General “But, General, during the S&L crisis of the mid-1980’s, it was common that the SEC sent recommendations and amassed evidence to the Attorney General’s office to prosecute those executives found to commit fraud through the SEC’s hard work. Did the SEC do that with the evidence amassed that need to the fines against the current banks?” “No”, replied the General (again, J-H reenacting the whole conversation). “Why not?” asks J-H’s Senator Warren.

J-H then stops, like like the SEC General, and looks out the window silently.

Elizabeth Warren EMBARRASSES Bank Regulators At F…: http://youtu.be/2F6YkBa_Tig

Also here are Reverend Run, Moby, Gloria Estevan, Rachel Maddow, and the Son of Svenghoulie. All are armed.

Back to “One Size Fits All”.

Happy Wednesday. Safe travels.

Monday, September 8, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the most favored 3:58PM out of the City, in the front train car just behind the locomotive. You may have noticed that I haven’t been talking about the morning trains recently. I think that pattern is due to a bit of laziness on my part, coupled with a habit of keeping abreast of the weekend current events and associated satire, as I travel into the City. I will make a point to report my observations about the inbound folks in De course.

It’s a lightly populated train car this afternoon. Jay Cutler is here. He doesn’t seem disappointed in the three point loss to the Buffalo Bills in yesterdays Season Opener. He, like me and many of my friends, were pleasantly surprised that it was only a three point loss. The loss, this time, can be squarely attributed to the three interceptions (nowadays called “turnovers” like the savory puff pastry) deftly executed by Cutler.

Our man pulls out a pack of menthol cigarettes, but quickly puts them back in his pocket, realizing that he can’t smoke on the train without reprisals and media scrutiny. He falls asleep to the rhythm of the train, reliving every open receiver he could have hit to instead of their defensive backs.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is here. He’s talking to the back of the head of the young, Telly Savalas looking, bald fellow seated in front of him. J-H is a little miffed about the state of the GOP.

On one level, it looks like the GOP will take back the House and win over the Senate. Happy days are here again, right? In the name of the American Family, they can repeal the destructive healthcare law that just doesn’t help average Americans. They can finally shut Elizabeth Warren and the Dems about profiting from Student Loans. After all, everyone knows Government should act more like Big Business. What better way to generate profit to reinvest in the debt reduction?

Increase sending rates to banks? asks his RINO personality, to the row of hair growing along Kojack’s neckline in front of him. Are you crazy? retorts Far Right, to the same hairline. Do you want to encumber growth? Stifle job creation? Kill the American Dream? Have we lost our minds?

He looks out the window to his right, contemplating that last question, in silence.

Also here are Clive Owen, Freddie Prinze Sr., the Hong Kong money launderer from The Dark Knight, and Rita Rudner. All are armed.

Happy Monday. Safe travels.

Friday, September 5, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I am sipping a beer as I ride the train home. A rare indulgence. Fat Tire, out of Colorado, and in keeping with my morphology, if you were curious.

I did a rare thing today. I took a photo, earlier, of a co-commuter. It was her hair, which strangely reminded me of 18th Century France during the time of Le Roi, Louis XIV. I have made all attempts to highlight the hair while masking the persons face. Quite frankly, I cannot tell from this distance if it is a later middle aged woman of Mediterranean extraction, or Chief Judge Antonin Scalia in drag. Here’s the manipulated photo.

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I love her hair. In the train car, it is the most natural and distinctive visual stimulus available. Well…the first stimulus, at least.

Speaking of visuals, there are two women chatting, some five seats back. The one on my left, aisle side, is very pretty. Probably late thirties, kids in school. Her friend is a bit older, early forties, growing gracefully into middle age. Window seat has bigger cheeks, a larger but not unhealthy frame, curly blonde hair.

Aisle seat is an elf by comparison. Kristen Bell with more angular features and brown hair. She reminds me of an unrequited college crush I once had. Aisle’s aura shines with power and stability. Very cool.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is very quiet. His far right self is probably brooding over the Ukraine-East Ukraine-Russian peace negotiations and how its conveniently happening as President BHO is in the Baltic for the NATO summit. His far right side will perk up saying “the US had nothing to do with it”, while his RINO is countering with ” We have roughly 5% of the US population just two generations away from the Ukraine and the Baltic States. We have military bases within pissing distance of Ukraine’s western border. No, we had nothing to do with that.” He looks out the window, contemplating the sarcasm in his own head(s).

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, young Chuck Norris, Woody Allen, Rosa Parks, Hank Greene, and Ally Sheedy. All are heavily armed.

Happy Friday. Safe travels.

Friday, September 5, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I am sipping a beer as I ride the train home. A rare indulgence. Fat Tire, out of Colorado, and in keeping with my morphology, if you were curious.

I did a rare thing today. I took a photo, earlier, of a co-commuter. It was her hair, which strangely reminded me of 18th Century France during the time of Le Roi, Louis XIV. I have made all attempts to highlight the hair while masking the persons face. Quite frankly, I cannot tell from this distance if it is a later middle aged woman of Mediterranean extraction, or Chief Judge Antonin Scalia in drag. Here’s the manipulated photo.

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I love her hair. In the train car, it is the most natural and distinctive visual stimulus available. Well…the first stimulus, at least.

Speaking of visuals, there are two women chatting, some five seats back. The one on my left, aisle side, is very pretty. Probably late thirties, kids in school. Her friend is a bit older, early forties, growing gracefully into middle age. Window seat has bigger cheeks, a larger but not unhealthy frame, curly blonde hair.

Aisle seat is an elf by comparison. Kristen Bell with more angular features and brown hair. She reminds me of an unrequited college crush I once had. Aisle’s aura shines with power and stability. Very cool.

Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde is very quiet. His far right self is probably brooding over the Ukraine-East Ukraine-Russian peace negotiations and how its conveniently happening as President BHO is in the Baltic for the NATO summit. His far right side will perk up saying “the US had nothing to do with it”, while his RINO is countering with ” We have roughly 5% of the US population just two generations away from the Ukraine and the Baltic States. We have military bases within pissing distance of Ukraine’s western border. No, we had nothing to do with that.” He looks out the window, contemplating the sarcasm in his own head(s).

Also here are Benched War Correspondent, young Chuck Norris, Woody Allen, Rosa Parks, Hank Greene, and Ally Sheedy. All are heavily armed.

Happy Friday. Safe travels.

Thursday, September 4, 2014 – Homeward Bound – trainspottingChicago

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Good afternoon.

I’m on the 3:58PM out of the City. I have decided to re-inhabit the first car, behind the engine, and hang with my favorite co-commuters.

Unfortunately, my absolute favorite spot is being occupied by a sleeping Vince Vaughn looking, drunk, thirty something fellow. He sleeps with his left hand tucked far into his pant waist. Far far into is pant waist. Now, I am unsure if his drab green, loosely fitting pocketed T-shirt was originally white. His not-hip, scruffy, un-jump-worthy, barely AirGazan (TM) gym shoes add an overall effect of high-functioning seat usurper.

I’m really not supposed to be on this train. I got caught up finishing off work I didn’t want to do. Some of it my boss tried to do, but couldn’t complete it in part because he recognizes that I have better language skills for official letter.

I give good …. diplomacy.

On Thursday’s I try to get on the 3:18PM because I have to get home and take my children to after-school math club. The club/tutoring is about twelve miles (~20km) from my house – all local traffic – about a forty five minute drive. We have to get there at 6:00PM. Getting home early gives me a chance to wash up, change into comfy clothing, and otherwise prepare for parenting after being in business mode.

That didn’t happen today. The curve ball in the game of day-to-day living. The good news is that, after chatting with my wife, she said she called the tutor and rescheduled the math class due to the previous long weekend. I’m home tonight. Good.

Not as good as the stylish Chris Tucker looking fellow, who is on his cell phone and, like the fast talking comedic actor, has not stop talking on his iCrackerBot since the train cleared the station.

He is a property manager for a large property development group, in charge of residential clients in low-to-mid level housing. He is chatting with a coworker or a colleague about Section 8 housing, a lapsed renter and what to do next. He may be a lawyer. After discussing the business issue, he goes back to chatting, incessantly, about a wedding he is attending and the drama happening around and about him.

I am sitting such that there are at least four or five sleeping heads blocking my view of Dr. Jeckyl-Hyde. This annoys me to no end.

Octomom is here. She is seated across from Chris Tucker and is seated next to an attractive, Laura Kightlinger looking woman. Both women’s legs are crossed daintily. Very “Real Housewives of the Western Suburbs” potential here. Lots of friendly chatting, but Octomom is totally gauging Laura’s  “backstabbing friend” quotient. I am not really sure if there is a metric, but a veteran “Real Housewives….” fan knows that there’s always one Housewife, in every location, that is doing the calculating.

Also here are Kirsten Dunzt, Harry Belefonte, Will Forte, Harvey Keitel, and Chris Rock. All are armed.

Happy Thursday. Safe travels.

Thursday, August 28, 2014 – Inbound – trainspottingChicago

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Good morning.

On the 7:25AM into the City. Got up early. Went a slightly different route to avoid construction on the (usually) shortest distance from home to station. Barely made the train.

This post will be short, in part because I started this entry late and I’m in shorts. No meetings. No one is at the office except me, working on a submittal and holding down the fort. I get to be ins shorts.

The blonde, pregnant, attractive woman, who reminds me of Alicia Silverstone, is here. She’s engrossed in a torrid page turner from her eReader device. Can we still call them page turners? With the advent of electronic publications, wouldn’t it be fitting to change terminology? I’ve heard the phrase “punching digits” for making a phone call, only because nobody actually dials anymore. “Screen sweeper” perhaps?

There is a young attractive Desi woman here, chocolate brown skin, straight hair parted on her right and draping down just last her shoulders. The teal green long sleeved sweater-blouse is accented by a seashell like neckless. Although also reading from an dreaded or iCrackerBot, she is distinctly aware of her surroundings. She looks too refined to be a student. She must be on her way to work? Newly minted attorney? Possibly.

Also here are Neal Patrick Harris, Allison Janney, the Swedish doctor from the Thor movie, and Pee Wee Herman. All are armed.

Happy Thursday. Safe travels.